Is this FOR you?

By the end of this article, you will have:

Decoded the art of unlocking people’s self-perception through engaging and fun questions.

Explored the social dynamic rule #2 – “When people are like each other, they like each other,” and leveraged it to reveal people’s subconscious self-identification.

Mastered a three-step process to unveil individuals’ unconscious self-attributes.

Is this like YOU?

� Have you ever wondered about the hidden layers of self-perception in yourself and others?

� Would you like to refine slightly your profiling skills?

� Are you curious about how understanding self-perception enhances your connections, communication and influence?

What will you learn?

You will learn how to decode, connect, and influence others by tapping into people’s self-perception through a fascinating exploration of preferred animals or any other avatar.

Specifically, you will delve into:

• Strategic uses of the question “Which animal would you like to be?” to unveil self-attributes
• A three-step process to uncover self-perception, gaining insights for profiling, relationship-building, and influence.
• How this enticing and fun process aligns with people’s emotional needs
• The importance of exploring preferences for a comprehensive understanding of unveiling self-attributes.
• Realise how this approach extends beyond animals or avatar selection and how it can help with various aspects of life.

Reminder – Why learn this?

Equipped with these insights, you have the advantage of:

Navigate social dynamics with finesse, understanding others at a profound level.
Elevate your ability to influence and build rapport effortlessly.
Skillfully profile candidates, friends, or life partners, making slightly more informed and insightful choices.

Recap previous article – The social principles of rapport building

As explained in this article, rapport is an unconscious process that follows two main principles:

Social principle # 1 – A relationship is a process of relating

Social principle # 2 – People like each other when they are like each other

In this article, we often refer to the social principle # 2 – People like each other when they are like each other.

Notice how people hang out with people of the same beliefs, faith or interests:
– Football fans, gym buddies, same ethnic group, cultural background …
– People adopt dogs that look like them

If you could be any animal, what would you choose?

Think about it…

Decode, connect, and influence by unlocking people’s self-perception with fun & unusual questions

This tall order is done by uncovering their preferred animal(s).

In essence, you subtly ask “Which animal would you like to be?”

This question is in line with the social dynamic rule #2 – “People like each other when they are like each other” as individuals often relate to attributes in animals that they either:
– believe they have
Or
– would like to have

This question serves as a gateway to their unconscious self-perception.

It encourages them to share their preferences and subconsciously identify with specific animal attributes.

Yet, a few other elements are necessary to make this one question effective, you can master this via the following 3 step process.

Uncover their preferred animal(s): Which animal would you like to be?

You:
“Which animal would you like to be?

The individual:
“I would pick a lion.”

Alternative questions are:
– If you were any animal, what would you pick?
– Which animal do you like?

“Which animal would you like to be? “serves as a gateway to their unconscious self-perception.

Exploring additional preferences: Which OTHER animal(s) would you like to be?

To gain a comprehensive view of their perceived attributes, you can inquire about other animals they like.

Example:

You:
“What other animal(s) would you like to be?”

The individual:
“I also like dolphins.”

You:
“Oh yeah and what else?”

The individual:
“I also love eagles”

This step ensures that you grasp different aspects of their self-perception, especially if they attribute distinct features to various animals.

Alternative questions are:
– Which OTHER animal(s) would you like to be?
– What else?
– What other animal would you pick?
– Are there any other animals you would like to be?

Note:
Inquiring about additional animals demonstrates a deeper interest in the person.
Asking “what else” can also set an open and non-judgmental environment.

“Which OTHER animal(s) would you like to be?” ensure grasping different aspects of their self-perception in case distinct features are attributed to various animals.

The most important part: “What do you like about this animal(s)?”

Remember the social dynamic rule #2 – “People like each other when they are like each other”, with this question you now dig into how they see or how they would like to see themselves.

Example:

The individual:
“Lions … well, that’s because they are strong & beautiful …
Tigers because they look nice & cool.
I like eagles as they are independent, free, cool, awesome, strong and majestic“

In this example, we could suppose that the person has or would like to have the attributes of being:
– “Look nice & cool”
– “Strong & beautiful”
– “Independent, free, cool, awesome, strong and majestic“

→ We can notice recurrent attributes about looks, strength and independence.

Regardless of the person’s chosen animal, you ask what they like about it, this is to extract the features and attributes of their chosen animal(s).

Alternative questions are:
– What do you like about this animal?
– What else?
– Apart from that, what else do you like?
– What is good about this animal?
– What is nice about this animal?

Note :
Avoid asking “why”, as this question:
– Frames the answer for reasons rather than what they like or love about it.
– May also set a judging tone for the conversation.

“What do you like about this animal(s)?” allows you to dig into how they see or how they would like to see themselves.

Attributes & their self-perception

Putting it into actual practical context with the above examples, animals don’t consciously think of themselves as independent or majestic.

Regardless of the chosen animal, it has ONLY to make sense to the individual as it reflects their self-perception.

What makes these questions fun to answer?

When people feel heard and non-judged, asking them “Which animal would you like to be” and “What do you like about this animal” allows them to:
– Express themselves freely
– Talk about what they like or love.

This aligns with their emotional needs for “Ego/sense of importance” and “Curiosity/growth.”

All the emotional needs are listed in this article.

Smoothly Asking the “Animal” Question

When interacting, smooth delivery and calibration are crucial.

It is crucial to be nonjudgmental about their answers and give your full attention to them.

Active listening techniques can be very useful here such as repeating back the words that have been said, not interrupting them…

You can also notice their “body language” and also consciously display listening cues, the latter can encourage them to talk further: showing your ear, nodding, entering peripheral vision … all of this and more is articulated at length in the social intelligence course.

Another key component is to set the frame gradually and smoothly.

The following script could be very smooth IF you have or know how to set a high level of report with them.

Example Script: Landing the Animal Question:

You:
“The other day, I was watching this animal documentary. I was thinking that it would be so tough to be an animal … if you were to be an animal, what would you pick? … It could be in the land, water or air, what animal would you pick?”

Them:
“I would pick a lion”

You:
“A lion? What do you like in the lion?”

Them:
“I like lions because they are strong & beautiful “

You:
“Strong & beautiful … what else do you like about the lion”

Them:
“Also because they are the king of the jungle, … that’s it.”

You:
“Anything else you would like to be? What would you pick if you were in the water or the air?”

Them:
“Oh yeah .. in the water I would pick a dolphin, they look nice, intelligent & cool … In the air, I would like to be an eagle because they are independent, free, cool, awesome, strong and majestic“

Note:

This questioning approach extends beyond animals to movie/anime characters, superheroes, athletes, or current and historical personalities … basically, anything/anyone with whom the person identifies!

Leverage their self-perception for more report

Now that you know how they perceive themselves and what they identify with, you have:

An insight into their character, aiding in anticipating future behaviour

You can remind them of their chosen attribute and line it with YOUR queries. Doing so might have them acting in consistency with their self-perception.

Example:
“You could excel in this job, enhancing your independence.”

“Let’s hit the gym and get strong.”

If they act rudely: “That’s not very majestic of you, is it?”

These questions can be a valuable tool for quick profiling in various aspects of life, recruiting a candidate, and meeting a friend or a spouse.

Individuals answering with descriptions

Sometimes, individuals may not explicitly answer with attributes but rather offer descriptions such as “no one bothers them” or “King of the jungle”.

In such cases, you can link into the B.E.M. needs (Body, Emotional, Materialistic needs) associated with it. To do this, ask yourself:

– “What’s the purpose of what is described?”

– “Which Physical (Body), Emotional, or Materialistic need is responded with this description?”

With “no one bothers them” the B.E.M needs to be linked to it can be “safety/certainty“.

With “King of the Jungle”, it can be more varied such as “ego/importance” as well as “safety/certainty“.

All emotional needs are detailed in this article, and the method of linking needs to actions is explained through chunking in the social intelligence course.

You can then mention those needs when interacting with them such as “We’ll be fine, no one will bother you” or “Maybe you can decide, what do you think about this one? (King of Jungle)“

Once known, ask with careful calibration what they like in these to extract their self-perceived features.

Enjoyed this article & curious to take it to the next level?

Realise that this article is an extract from the fundamentals of the Calm & Stress Management, Social Intelligence & Emotional Intelligence workshops.

These workshops are transformative blends of relaxation, mind management & communication tools & techniques. 

Designed to release your best, these workshops will deliver you the methods to :
Become more relaxed & reduce your stress
Be in charge of your emotions & increase your well-being
Develop your leadership & influence

→ For any questions about these workshops, you can schedule your FREE discovery call to find out more.

Up until next time, go learn & go RELEASE YOUR BEST !!!

The post Discover how people see themselves with fun questions & boost rapport 🤔✨🤩 first appeared on Release your BEST.

Is this FOR you?

By the end of this article, you will have :

Discovered the complexities of your mind’s 8-step unconscious sequence, helping you understand yourself better and grow as a person.

Mastered the art of retracing your thoughts, using the 8-step sequence as a powerful roadmap for self-reflection, growth, and behavioural improvement.

Discovered how this process enhances your self-awareness, becoming your catalyst for productive change and personal development.

Recognised the profound impact of heightened self-awareness on your ability to interpret, act, and react to events in your life.

Is this like YOU?

� Have you ever caught yourself in cycles of reactions without understanding why?

� Would you like to enhance your self-awareness and gain better control over your thoughts and behaviours?

� Would you like to know the unconscious sequence that drives your mind’s responses?

What will you learn?

You will dive into the understanding of your mind’s 8-step sequence, uncovering the process of interpreting, acting, and reacting.

Specifically, you will explore:
– What this “8-step sequence” is and how it unfolds in your mind.
– How each step sharpens your ability to notice and interpret the meaning of events.
– How knowing each sequence elevates your understanding of your actions and reactions.
– Why understanding consciously this unconscious process is crucial in your personal and professional life.

Reminder – Why learn this?

Armed with this knowledge, you gain the upper hand to:
Direct yourself towards your targetted goals.
Enhance your overall well-being and self-confidence.
Effectively manage any unwanted thoughts or behaviours originating from your PRIMAL mind (Emotional brain).

E-motion brings motion !

Recap previous articles – Your brain architecture

In this article, I frequently mention your PRIMAL and RATIONAL minds, as well as your DATABASE and SENSES.

These components collectively form your brain architecture, a concept explored in detail throughout this article.

As exposed in this article, the PRIMAL mind represents your limbic system, it is your emotional brain.

The RATIONAL mind represents your frontal lobe, it is your rational brain, all details are in this article.

The merger of your PRIMAL (Emotional) & your RATIONAL mind is your THINKING CENTER.
It balances the thinking agenda & positive intent of both PRIMAL & RATIONAL minds. You can find further details about this feature of your brain in this article.

The temporal lobe is responsible for memory function, we refer to it as your DATABASE as explained in this article.

Your SENSES encompass your faculties for sensation, touch, reading, spatial perception, vision, and colour blindness, all of which are exposed in this article.

The MAP of your mind

Your mind follows an unconscious & innate process, characterised by an 8-step sequence:

Step 1: Events
Events are occurring around you.

Step 2: Notice
You notice one specific EVENT via your SENSES.

Step 3: Scan
Your PRIMAL mind scans it (at the THINKING CENTER).

Step 4: Pass information
Your PRIMAL mind forms a perception.
It relays it to your RATIONAL mind (at the THINKING CENTER).

Step 5: Check & answer
Your PRIMAL & RATIONAL mind checks your DATABASE for information about the EVENT, receiving immediate answers.

Step 6: Regulate (If needed)
If no HUGE danger, your RATIONAL mind regulates the input of your PRIMAL mind about the EVENT (at the THINKING CENTER).

Step 7: Interpret
You give a meaning (INTERNAL CONCLUSION) to the EVENT.

Step 7: BODY reaction: BEHAVIOUR & BIOLOGY
This is how your BODY react & how your body responds to that EVENT.

The following provides a step-by-step explanation with examples at each stage.

The MIND MAP 8-step sequence:

Step 1: Events

Events are happening around you and at all times.

Examples:
– A car passing by
– A bird
– An ad for a sofa
– A baby crying
– A person sobbing …

Step 2: Notice (SENSES)

The EVENT that you noticed goes through your SENSES.

This is what you:
– See
– Hear
– Smell
– Taste
– Touch

All information about this brain function is detailed in this article.

Step 3: Scan (PRIMAL mind)

The information about the EVENT goes through to your THINKING CENTER.

The EVENT is initially scanned by your EMOTIONAL (PRIMAL) mind; this is for scouting any danger & threats and attacks.

This is to:
Fulfil
Protect 
➥ Your P.E.M. needs (Physical. Emotional. Material)

Examples:
– Someone offering a drink:
 “Yes” or “No”
➥ Fulfilling PHYSICAL needs

– Someone shout at you:
You might argue with them!
➥ Caring for EGO/SAFETY

– Someone attacking you with a gun
Run away or fight back!
➥ Protecting your SAFETY needs with F.F.F instincts.

All information about your PRIMAL mind is outlined in this article, revealing the source driving your impulses, needs, and instincts.

The EVENT is first scanned by your EMOTIONAL (PRIMAL) mind for scouting danger & threats and attacks.

Step 4: Pass information (PRIMAL & RATIONAL)

As indicated in this article, your PRIMAL mind is in charge of your instinctive reactions: the FIGHT, FLIGHT, FREEZE mechanism (F.F.F.).

If your PRIMAL mind asses an EVENT as a big danger (Examples: Hearing a gunshot, someone attacking you,…) it would take over with its F.F.F. response.

If the EVENT is NOT a HUGE threat, your RATIONAL mind would regulate any PRIMAL thoughts & impulses about the EVENT per your DATABASE content.

This process is presented in this picture:

Example of RATIONAL mind regulation:
– Someone offers you a massive chocolate cake:
You might answer:
“No, thank you because xxx (reasons)”
or “Yeah I would love to, I love chocolate (reasons)“

Whatever it might be, the reason is held in your DATABASE.

If your PRIMAL mind asses an EVENT as a big danger, it would take over with its FIGHT, FLIGHT, FREEZE responses.

If NOT, your RATIONAL mind would regulate any PRIMAL thoughts & impulses per your DATABASE content.

Step 5: Check & answer (DATABASE)

Both minds check into the DATABASE for information checking & relevancy, providing immediate answers.

The DATABASE allows you to make sense of the world as it contains all the information you know.

Examples:
If you read or hear:
–“Chocolate”
–“Rain”
–“Beach”
→ You can make a picture in your mind’s eye, and maybe a sound too.

The DATABASE checking and answering can happen in less than a second.

It contains data about:
– Yourself & the world around you: Beliefs (self-esteem), values, memories.
– Your know-how: Languages, skills, crafts…
– Your how-to: How you like, love, trust…

Examples:
– Someone offering you a massive chocolate cake:

You might answer:
“No, that wouldn’t be good for me” 
➥ As you might KNOW (from your DATABASE) too much sugar “isn’t good for you” (Physical need)

To discover all the components of your DATABASE and raise your self-awareness, visit this article.

Both PRIMAL & RATIONAL minds check into the DATABASE for information checking & relevancy, providing immediate answers.

Step 6: Regulate (RATIONAL mind)

If the EVENT is NOT a huge threat, your RATIONAL mind would regulate any PRIMAL impulses and emotionally based responses.

Example:
– Someone offers you a massive chocolate cake:

You might THINK:
“I would love to, I love chocolate, (impulse and emotionally based response) yet that wouldn’t be good for me (Database check & regulation)” 

You would then SAY:
➥ “No, I am fine, I will have something else please”

The regulation process is done at the THINKING CENTER by your RATIONAL mind.

All information about the RATIONAL mind’s functions, including its ability to regulate thoughts and impulses, is explained in this article.

For more details about your THINKING CENTER, the hub of balancing facts and feelings is articulated in this article.

If the EVENT is not a huge threat, your RATIONAL mind would regulate any PRIMAL impulses and emotional responses.

Step 7: Interpret (INTERNAL CONCLUSION)

At this stage, your brain gives INSTANTLY meaning to the event. This meaning can also be about a situation or someone, this is defining your feelings or emotions.

Examples: happy, sad, unsure, upset, excited).

In this framework, we refer to it as your INTERNAL CONCLUSION.

Examples :
– You see a dog and you might:
➥ Pet the animal or be terrified of it

-You see a meaty & greasy burger and you might:
➥ Get hungry or be disgusted by it

-You hear a song and you might:
➥ Vibe with it or find it annoying.

Simply, an event comes to your attention and your mind gives it meaning INSTANLY.

Simply put, the INTERNAL CONCLUSION gives meaning to the information of that event:
“No, that wouldn’t be good for me” 

Note: The basis of your INTERNAL CONCLUSIONS

The meaning you give to something is based on:

– The content of your DATABASE

– The rationale of the mind running at that time, it can be your PRIMAL mind or a mix of both your RATIONAL & PRIMAL mind.

Example: Remember a time you were caught up in a dispute with a loved one, can you remember which mind was running?

→  Was it under your PRIMAL mind?
Were you having impulsive & short-term emotionally charged thoughts?
Example: “Let’s get off, I want to kill that f*** guy!”

→  Was it under your RATIONAL mind?
Were you considering the dispute with perspective, evaluating its long-term consequences?
Example: Cooling yourself down and offering to speak later to avoid any further escalation.

Recognising and noticing which mind is running at any given time is another self-awareness skill. It is articulated in detail in this article.

Step 7: BODY reaction

Your BODY responds to the INTERNAL CONCLUSION with your:
– BEHAVIOUR
– BIOLOGY

The BEHAVIOUR & BIOLOGY responses occur instantaneously & simultaneously. 

Behaviour

This is what you:
– Do: your actions
– Project: your words, facial expressions & body language

Examples :
Feeling uncomfortable and saying “No” by :
– Frowning
– Turning your raising lip corners 
– Showing no with your hands
– Saying the word “No”

The BEHAVIOUR are your actions and projections, observed externally.

Biology

It is your biological response to deal with certain situations, involving hormones and neurotransmitters.

Biology is what can happen inside the body.

Hormones responses examples

Melatonin:
Released naturally towards the end of the day, it regulates your sleep/wake cycles. It is highly influenced by exposure to sunlight, bright lights and darkness.

Cortisol & adrenaline:
Different hormones are released for perceived high-stress situations: a fight, bungee jumping, an argument, running late and being stuck in traffic/train…

Neurotransmitters responses examples

Endorphins:
These are released when laughing, after exercising …

Dopamine:
Produces good feelings when consuming sugar, and coffee, engaging in sex, or browsing social media.

Oxytocin:
This is the “bonding feeling”, it is triggered by touch, cuddles, petting, strong eye contact… 

Serotonin:
This feels nice and it flows when you feel like you are gaining a “one up” socially: a new job, home, a promotion, a compliment…

Practical applications

Mastering the MIND MAP 8 steps is a valuable tool to improve how well you know yourself. This is a critical asset for self-reflection, growth, setting boundaries and overall behavioural improvement.

As you get the hang of these steps, think of them as your guide for navigating around what’s happening around you.

It is something you can use every day, across several contexts to help you think more clearly and make better choices.

In personal life

Consider a situation where a friend invites you to a late-night event, but you have an early morning meeting the next day. Your PRIMAL thinking process kicks in: you’d love to go out and catch up.

Yet your RATIONAL mind, when consulting your DATABASE for evaluation of the situation, might consider the consequences of going out.

Your RATIONAL mind might help you decide and answer: “I’d love to join, but unfortunately, I have work obligations early tomorrow, so I’ll be for next time.”

In professional life

Picture a work situation where you are facing tight deadlines at work, causing you stress.

With increased self-awareness, you catch early signs like a racing heart or scattered thoughts.

Using consciously your RATIONAL thinking, you can reframe this challenge as an opportunity to showcase your skills.

Consequently, in future tight deadlines situations, you would become more able to regulate these types of thoughts.

You wouldn’t fall under the stress-causing pattern thanks to your elevated self-awareness and RATIONAL self-management.

Ultimately, helping you handle it more efficiently, and approach it confidently.

Enjoyed this article & curious to take it to the next level?

Realise that this article is an extract from the fundamentals of the Calm & Stress Management, Social Intelligence & Emotional Intelligence workshops.

These workshops are transformative blends of relaxation, mind management & communication tools & techniques. 

Designed to release your best, these workshops will deliver you the methods to :
Become more relaxed & reduce your stress
Be in charge of your emotions & increase your well-being
Develop your leadership & influence

→ For any questions about these workshops, you can schedule your FREE discovery call to find out more.

Up until next time, go learn & go RELEASE YOUR BEST !!!

The post 🗝️🗺️🧠Unlock your mind’s map: Your 8-step blueprint for self-awareness and rational Thinking first appeared on Release your BEST.

Is this FOR you?

By the end of this article, you will have :

Elevated your ability to initiate authentic, genuine and effortless interactions.

Grasped the significance of rapport building for instant connections, influence, and networking.

Took away the fundamental drive of meaningful connections and professional partnerships.

Acquired an approach on how to navigate social dynamics with finesse and how to nurture lasting relationships.

Is this like YOU?

Have you ever found yourself to:
– Struggle to establish a genuine connection when meeting new people or with colleagues?
– Experience challenges in building rapport & trust with clients or team members?

Would you like to know the two fundamental laws of rapport building? By doing so, it can serve as a guiding principle in your interactions with others.

What will you learn?

You will gain insights into “conscious rapport building” & its “social principles”.

Specifically, you will learn about its:
– Definition
– Core principles
– Significant impact on your professional and personal realms.

Reminder – Why learn this?

With this knowledge, you would be in an improved position to:
Strengthened and refined your interpersonal & communication skills
Gear yourself toward the impact & results that you want
Increase your well-being & self-confidence
Manage any unwanted thoughts or behaviour stemming from your PRIMAL mind (Emotional brain)

E-motion brings motion !

Recap previous article – Your PRIMAL mind & its connection with the social dynamic principles

This article mentions your PRIMAL (Emotional) mind.

It represents your limbic system, which is the hub of your emotions. To ease your understanding, we refer to it as your PRIMAL MIND.

it is a MAJOR part of your brain architecture as it interconnects with various other brain components, including:
– The frontal lobe, responsible for reasoning, which we call your RATIONAL MIND.
– The temporal lobe, handling memory functions, which we term your DATABASE.

This is explained in detail in this article, you can read it to understand what you are made of.

What is rapport?

Have you ever been with a friend, a partner, or maybe someone you just met and felt like they “get you”?

Some of us can describe it as that “warm feeling” or “feeling of butterflies in the stomach”.
Others described it as just feeling familiar with people.

It is essential for smooth conversations, whether in personal or professional settings.

Being in rapport is about GENUINE:
– Feel & share understanding with you and others
– Establish trust
– Demonstrate empathy
– Be in an environment where individuals feel valued and heard

Building rapport consciously is about taking charge of your interactions.

This is much like conducting a symphony, it involves skillfully orchestrating verbal and non-verbal communication.

These compose a harmonious masterpiece of collaboration and cultivating relationships that thrive.

Building rapport consciously is about taking charge of your interactions

Why build rapport consciously?

There are many benefits & purposes of building rapport consciously.

It would positively impact your personal and professional life.

Impact on your personal & professional life

Effective communication:
Have you ever had a brainstorming session where everyone felt free to share ideas openly?
This is the effect of rapport in action, making communication a breeze.
– In professional life:
A team meeting where colleagues comfortably voice their opinions.
– In personal life:
Chatting with friends about weekend plans and having everyone contribute.

Building trust:
Trust is the outcome of being in rapport with others.
Once established, trust is the key ingredient for solid collaborations.
Think of a project where teammates trust each other’s expertise and judgment.
– In professional life:
Trusting your coworker to handle a critical task
– In personal life:
Trusting a friend to keep a secret.

Conflict resolution:
When disagreements arise, being in rapport and having a mutual understanding speeds up conflict resolution.
It’s like having a built-in mediator.
– In professional life:
Resolving a project disagreement through open communication.
– In personal life:
Settling a dispute with a friend by understanding each other’s perspectives.

Outcomes in your professional life

Team collaboration:
Teams with positive connections collaborate more effectively, leading to increased productivity and overall success.
– In professional life:
A successful project where team members complement each other’s strengths.
– In personal life:
Organising a community event with your friends.

Enhancing relationships:
This is the result of strong relationships built on genuine rapport.
Picture a workplace where everyone gets along like a tight-knit family.
– Example in professional life:
Developing a mentor-mentee bond that goes beyond work.
– Example in personal life:
Forming lifelong friendships from work connections.

Influence and persuasion:
Building rapport enhances your ability to influence, making people more receptive to your ideas.
Ever convinced your team to adopt a new approach?
– In professional life:
Pitching a new strategy that gains team approval.
– In personal life:
Getting your friends to try a new hobby together.

Career advancement:
It’s about connecting, networking effectively, and leaving a positive impression on your peers and clients.
In the professional world, landing a job often involves more than just qualifications.
– In professional life:
Networking at industry events to secure job opportunities.
– In personal life:
Landing freelance gigs through connections made at social events.

Networking:
Building rapport is the secret sauce in networking.
It opens doors, connects you with influential people, and brings exciting opportunities your way.
– In professional life:
Networking at conferences to expand career opportunities.
– In personal life:
Making friends at social gatherings who introduce you to new hobbies or interests.

Building rapport is a game-changer in both professional and personal realms.

It allows you to create positive connections, paving the way for success, and unleashing a positive vibe wherever you go.

The social principles of rapport building

Rapport is a natural process that happens unconsciously.

Yet when honing its innate principles you will appreciate the unconscious process that occurs with your interactions.

• Social principle # 1 – “A relationship is a process of relating”
  
• Social principle # 2 – “When people are like each other, they like each other”

Social principle # 1 – A relationship is a process of relating

When examining your relationships (friends, partner…) notice that you and others are relating to each other’s needs.

They somehow respond to your needs and you respond to theirs, which is why you are in a “relationship” with them.

Examples with friends:
Be interested in the same subject: sports, travelling and interacting with them about it:
– Supporting the same football team and watching games together
– Having the same fashion sense and going clothes shopping together

Examples with a romantic partner:
– Having mutual physical attraction
– Sharing the same sense of humour
– Having goals and aspirations that are aligned with each other

Mutually addressing each other’s needs creates a connection, as it satisfies something meaningful for both parties.

→ Simply put, you are involved with things that “benefit” or “fit you” and others do the same with you.

“A relationship is a process of relating”

Social principle # 1

Social principle # 2 – When people are like each other, they like each other

Rapport is also a process of responsiveness.

Examples :
– People adopt dogs that look like them
The article Do Dogs Look Like Their Owners? from Psychology Today suggested that Data confirms that owners and their dogs tend to look alike.

– People hang out with people of the same beliefs, faith or interest:
Football fans, gym buddies, same ethnic group, cultural background …

Occasionally, it might not explicitly lead to “liking” in its literal sense; rather, it could start as a casual interest, and grow into authentic affection over time, especially when principles 1 & 2 are in play.

Note :
Rapport building encompasses various elements, including your approach, skills (active listening, interpreting body language…), mindset and beliefs about people, and the world you live in. It also includes your agenda, wants and needs during interactions with others. Detailed explanations of all these components are provided in the social intelligence course.

The social principles & your PRIMAL mind

Your PRIMAL mind is responsible for meeting your needs as outlined in this article.

→ This means that when consciously applying the “Social principle #1 – A relationship is a process of relating“, it elicits a positive response in others’ PRIMAL minds.

→ “When people are like each other, they like each other” is a social dynamic principle that specifically feeds your PRIMAL (Emotional) mind’s need & drive for “Familiarity“.

“Familiarity” needs can be met by relating to whatever you and others are expressing.

It can be built on:
– Culture, behaviour and centre of interest: hobbies, religion …
– Physical appearance: looking alike, similar fashion sense, body.
Note: This is often shown via non-verbal communication: gestures, voice, tone
– Languages: speaking the same way, accents, …
Note: This is often shown via verbal communication: Words

→ Other needs that can find fulfilment through a high level of rapport include:
– “Connection/tribe“
– “Ego/sense of importance“.

For you to capture the essence of rapport bonding, it is essential to be fully aware of our PRIMAL (Emotional) mind’s needs & drive. These are listed in this article on our website.

“When people are like each other, they like each other”

Social principle # 2

There are many components to rapport building yet these two principles are the main driving force behind report building.

Once you master how to apply it consciously, you can eventually manage your interaction to a high level of rapport.

Apply the social principles with verbal & non-verbal blueprints

Communication is divided into verbal and non-verbal signals.

Verbal communication uses spoken or written words for explicit expression.

Non-verbal communication involves gestures, facial expressions, and body movements to convey emotions and nuances.

Both components work together to create a comprehensive and effective means of human interaction.

For a straightforward and applicable implementation of the social principles, the following articles offer detailed frameworks for instantly establishing rapport in your personal or professional endeavours.

Communication is divided into verbal (words) and non-verbal (body language) signals.

Verbal tool (Words):
You can pick up the “F.A.N.C.Y words alchemy” for an instant report.
It focuses on the words and frames you can use to build rapport.

Non-verbal (body language) tool:
You can grab the “E.V.E.N.T.T.S charisma toolbox“, which turns you into a social magnet.
This article lists the body language signals (non-verbal actions) you can consciously use to build rapport.

The success and impact of these methods is grounded in their ability to meet the essential needs and drives of the PRIMAL (Emotional) mind, which include:
“Familiarity”
“Connection/tribe”
“Ego/sense of importance”.

Enjoyed this article & curious to take it to the next level?

Realise that this article is an extract from the fundamentals of the Calm & Stress Management, Social Intelligence & Emotional Intelligence workshops.

These workshops are transformative blends of relaxation, mind management & communication tools & techniques. 

Designed to release your best, these workshops will deliver you the methods to :
Become more relaxed & reduce your stress
Be in charge of your emotions & increase your well-being
Develop your leadership & influence

→ For any questions about these workshops, you can schedule your FREE discovery call to find out more.

Up until next time, go learn & go RELEASE YOUR BEST !!!

The post 🤝 📈 Supercharge your social skills with its game-changing social principles!💡💬 first appeared on Release your BEST.

Breakthrough your comfort zone – What will you get from this article?

Is this FOR you?

By the end of this article, you will have:

Understood the emotional nature of your COMFORT zone.

Grasped how your COMFORT zone is helping you; and yet how it is not fulfilling you.

Discovered all the necessary & chronological steps for leaving your COMFORT zone.

Grabbed a success-proof process, with sequential phases to leave your COMFORT & attain mastery of a new skill, and also build COMFORT with that new situation or interaction.

Raised your awareness of all the emotional stages; and challenges that you will encounter with mastering that new skill set.
Examples:
– Getting out of poverty by learning how to earn money.
– Escape from bullying by learning how to defend yourself through martial arts.

Note:
This also means that when you will master the emotional stages involved with learning that new skill, this can ease your learning which can ultimately improve your situation.

Is this like YOU?

� Have you ever been:
– Stucked in that “COMFORT zone”? Meaning not willing to take risks? Or not even trying anything new?
– Avoiding new experiences?
– Taking action eventually and eventually shortly giving up?
– Not following through, especially when the “going” gets tough?`

� Would it be useful for you to:
– Discover our universal human nature when we face challenges?
– Find out if you fall into that universal behavioural pattern?

� Would like you to pick up the “emotional roadmap” when:
– Developing and mastering a new skill set?
– Becoming comfortable with a new situation or interaction?

What will you learn?

You will learn about your “COMFORT zone”, specifically:
– What it is?
– How it works?
– What does it do to you?
– How to get out of it?
– Lastly, how to become comfortable with something that is currently “uncomfortable”?
→ This means building NEW COMFORT with the uncomfortable.

Reminder – Why learn this?

With this knowledge, you would be in an improved position to:
Gear yourself toward the impact & results that you want
Increase your well-being & self-confidence
Manage any unwanted thoughts or behaviour stemming from your PRIMAL mind (Emotional brain – See this article for information on your emotional brain)

E-motion brings motion !

How good you are you at leaving your COMFORT zone

Your story is the same as mine:
The universal human drive tied to your COMFORT zone

DISCLAIMER:
Only for the purpose of illustration, I will mention my journey to illustrate how you and I are the same, how we are both driven by the same universal human drive.

You and all of us had a mentor. And yes, I can tell you my life, I’ll tell you a few nuggets of knowledge only to make that point.

When I was 17 years old, I learned how to do Taekwondo.

At 25, I worked in retail, fashion retail for Yves St-Laurent and a few other designers, so I learnt how to dress.

A few years down the line, at 30 years of age, I wanted a bit of muscle, so I started training with a PT.

With a bit of muscle, just a little bit, at 35 I wanted to get a grip on my emotions. To the point that I had a few different mentors who taught me about emotional intelligence, neuro-linguistic programming and a few other topics that get that grip on my emotions.

But now all these stories and including your own stories, with your current abilities: speaking, driving or whatever that you’re so good to do.

� What do your experiences and my experiences have in common? �

My experience and all your experiences, what do they have in common?

The willingness to LEARN & GROW.

→ How do you grow & learn?

For a lot of us, when we want to learn and grow, we all have this nice and cosy COMFORT zone. And we are all inclined to stay up there.

But, how do you get outside of that COMFORT zone? As outside of it, is threatening.

Well, realise that:

Learning, and growing is a PROCESS.

� How do you get the willingness to learn & grow?�

The emotion that ties you to your COMFORT zone

In green, this is your COMFORT zone.

Notice above the name are the emotion that most people would feel, what is the main feeling there?

As you see there, it’s comforting, its main feeling is SAFETY.

Note:
Staying in your COMFORT zone can fulfil your need for “Familiarity/Safety”, this is a necessary emotional need as highlighted in this article about your PRIMAL mind.

That need for COMFORT (Familiarity/Safety’) can be developing familiarity with:
– People
– Culture
– Faces
– Places
– Topics & knowledge
– Know-how & literacy: skills/competency
– Environment

Examples of safety with travelling:
– Someone may NOT travel abroad alone due to unknown factors and causing the person to feel unsafe.

– While another person can travel to faraway lands and can feel safe in the hotel, or plane as that person may have already done (familiarity) many trips alone. It now feels comfortable for that person to do it again and again!

→ Anything known can go FOR your innate need for “Familiarity/Safety”.
→ Anything UN-known can AGAINST your innate need for “Familiarity/Safety”.

Get out of the COMFORT zone

But why do you want to get out of there? Why?

It’s on you!

Simply because your needs are not met, in your COMFORT you are unfulfilled.

Example of unfulfilled needs with my story:

– When I was 17, I felt weak. I didn’t know how to fight.
– At 25, I didn’t know how to dress up.
– When I was 30, I didn’t know how to have a strong body.
– And lastly, I didn’t have a grip on my emotions before I became an emotional trainer.

If you don’t get outside your COMFORT zone, you are already unhappy and this is on YOU already!

If you stay in your COMFORT zone, realise that some of your others needs are not met.

So, what do you do to get outside of your comfort zone?

From COMFORT to MASTERY (NEW COMFORT zone)

REMINDER:
The words on top of each zone are the emotions that most people feel when going through each zone.

� What does emotion do to you? �

E-motion brings motion.

So from that SAFETY, your “needs are unmet, unfulfilled and ACTION” is taken, consequently & next is the STUCK zone.

COMFORT to the STUCK zone

In the STUCK ZONE, you would feel stuck and along with it, you feel PAIN.

One of the reasons for that PAIN is that you don’t know what to do and it hurts.

And this is when maybe when a mentor can share that knowledge. And yet, it is still hard, it hurts.

The PAIN can also be fear, exasperation, or resentment.

A way out can be with the process of “rationalise & force yourself” through the next zone.

Note on rationalisation:
There are many ways to rationalise, it is all articulated in the emotional intelligence workshop.

One way to rationalise is to remember that you’re unhappy as your needs are not met.

So whatever you do, you do it for you.

So do you really want that need to be met?

Example of unfulfilled needs with my story:
– Do you want to know how to fight? (Taekwondo)
– Do you want to know how to dress up? (Fashion jobs)
– Do you want that body and strength? (Gym)

It’s up to you to meet your needs.

If you do want it, then push through that STUCK zone by reminding yourself to meet your need.

So whatever you do, you do it for you.

STUCK to the LEARNING zone

You are now in the LEARNING zone, where your mentor is even more important.

But here the main emotion here is FRUSTRATION. In the LEARNING zone, you do get frustrated.

So, what do you do for the next step?!
→ You “execute & commit” yourself to that process.

How do you do that?

Your mentor can eventually help you because that person is qualified to have the process, behaviour, habits and beliefs for that success.

Example of unfulfilled needs with my story:
– So, for example, I learned taekwondo, the guy was a master at Taekwondo, so he taught me, he has a track record.

After you “execute & commit“, this process leads you to your own MASTERY:
→ Your new comfort zone.

LEARNING to MASTERY (NEW COMFORT zone)

Example of unfulfilled needs with my story:
Writing this article, delivering workshops on emotional intelligence was uncomfortable, even very uncomfortable.

Yet through time, through practice, through remembering that this is for my needs to be met and it is also fulfilling my purpose.

I rationalised it, I forced through it and execute it as we speak!

And I am still committed to it, so that now, this becomes my NEW comfort zone.

So, whatever you want you to do, whatever you want to learn.

Remember, it is all about your needs & what you want.

It is all for YOU & only for YOU.
So take action, rationalise, force it through, execute and commit!

Enjoyed this article & curious to take it to the next level?

Realise that this article is an extract from the fundamentals of the Calm & stress management, Social intelligence & Emotional intelligence workshops.

These workshops are transformative blends of relaxation, mind management & communication tools & techniques. 

Designed to release your best, these workshops will deliver you the methods to :
Become more relaxed & reduce your stress
Be in charge of your emotions & increase your well being
Develop your leadership & influence

→ For any questions about these workshops, you can schedule your FREE discovery call to find out more.

Up until next time, go learn & go RELEASE YOUR BEST !!!

The post 💥 Shatter comfort zones, conquer new challenges! Ready to redefine your limits? 💪 first appeared on Release your BEST.

Is this FOR you?

By the end of this article, you will have:

Unlocked one of your most unconscious body language patterns: the “E-motion/Motion feedback” loop.

Discovered how to take charge & manage your thoughts, mood & feelings using that “E-motion/Motion” effect.

Mastered how to leverage it for instant confidence, communicate vibrant charisma, and also have people around you unconsciously making you feel even more confident.

Leverage the power of social dynamics to enhance your high power stance: this is the virtuous cycle of SELF-PROJECTION to SOCIAL REPUTATION.

Is this like YOU?

� Have you ever had thoughts or feelings that got you:
– Feeling nervous or anxious before something important?
– Got into thoughts that almost freaked yourself out? This is by thinking about what might happen next.
If so, would you like to know an easy technique to get rid of them?

� Would it be useful for you to pick up one of the fundamentals of empowerment in body language?

� Simply put, would you like to learn how to switch from a bad mood to radiating confidence, warmth & charisma?

What will you learn?

You will learn about the “E-motion/Motion” feedback loop, specifically:
– What it does to you & how it impacts you mentally & socially.
– How to leverage that “E-motion/Motion” feedback loop for performance, self-assurance, and allure.

You will also learn how to enhance your high power feeling with the cycle of SELF-PROJECTION to SOCIAL REPUTATION.

Reminder – Why learn this?

With this knowledge, you would be in an improved position to:
Gear yourself toward the impact & results that you want
Increase your well-being & self-confidence
Manage any unwanted thoughts or behaviour steeming from your PRIMAL mind (Emotional brain)

E-motion brings motion !

Recap previous article – The “E-motion/Motion” looping effect

As exposed in this previous article, we have seen and understood that:

Your emotions have an impact on your motions:

The opposite happens too, your motion has an impact on your emotions:

Your “Motion” can dictate your “E-motion”

The reciprocity between your emotions & motions leads to the below looping effect:

All this is articulated in detail in this article.

With conscious use of the “E-motion/Motion” looping effect, now you can:
Get rid of unwanted emotions & moods
Decide if you want to feel confident, happy, intimidating…
Choose how you can be perceived by others

Snap out it: Get rid of unwanted moods & emotion

Do you feel & show insecurity or confidence?

Realise that certain poses and postures are expressions of inner feelings of confidence or insecurity.

In body language, these are labelled as “high-power” or “low-power”.

Notice how the following postures are “high power postures“, these are indeed expressions of feelings of high self-confidence, strength, and energy.

Empowering/high power pose:
Notice the common patterns with the:
Body: Erected spine & taking lots of space with the arms & legs, these are open & spread.
Head: Held high & up
Face: With happy and/or composed facial expressions: lively eyes, gentle smile …

While the postures below are “low power postures“, these express feelings of awkwardness, powerlessness, fatigue shyness, insecurity, and timidity.

Disempowering/Low power pose
Notice the common patterns with the:
Body: Slounching & taking little space: arms & legs crossed
Head: Down & low
Face: Sad facial expression: pursed lips, eyes frowned & the angles of the eyes are down, eyes are dull in expression…

By adopting a different or opposite posture of what you are feeling, you can feel them less strongly, you can even override any unwanted feelings.

Any unwanted moods & disempowering feelings can be reduced by adopting a high-power posture.

Simply put, get in charge of your feelings by literally “picking yourself up”.

Openness, confidence, warmth, romance, and friendliness … can be felt and communicated if judged to be useful. Do bear in mind that social calibration is key.

This means that you can also use your body, face, and gestures for changing to how you want to feel.

Override any unwanted mood & disempowering feeling by picking yourself up with a high-power posture.

“Take” it to make it: Decide how you want to feel

As your motion (body, face & gesture) is linked to your emotions, through the looping effect you can take on the gesture, posture, and facial expression that you want to feel.

This can be done via the D.A.F sequence (Decide – Act – Feel):
1 – Decide: Which emotion you want to feel?
2 – Act: Move & make motion according to your chosen emotion
3 – Feel: Allow yourself to embrace the feeling of the emotion that you chose

→ D.A.F: Decide, Act & Feel

Overly simplistically put, “take” it to feel it!

Switch it: Feel confident, happy, or intimidating

Below are examples of postures and gestures that you can adopt in order to feel in those ways.

Stress to confidence :

Feeling stressed before a presentation or a meeting?
Get into this high-power & self-confident pose :
Get your chest up, speak with a deep voice, smile & nod slowly …

Anger to happiness :

Going through an angering moment?
Hijack the feeling with this victory pose & a smile:
Open up your body, start taking space, open your eyes, embrace what you can see around you, and get your hands up & with positive gestures: victory sign, thumbs up …

Intimidated to threatening :

Feeling intimidated?
Cast that feeling away with this powerful & threatening pose:
Get your chest up, lower your head with a predatory gaze, look into people for more than a second, get your hands close to your body, or put it behind your back …

These are empowering postures that can alleviate any unwanted feelings & moods: stressed, upset, scared, …. and switch yourself into attitudes you’d like to feel.

Switch it to feel it!

Note : Self-awareness & social awareness are necessary
As much as these poses can be done when alone and with others, it is key to have:
Self-awareness to notice your emotions
Social awareness so that you can calibrate your poses according to the social context & power dynamics.

→ All of this is explained in the “Emotional Intelligence” course.

Take charge of your feelings by taking charge of your posture

The POWER of SELF-PROJECTION to SOCIAL REPUTATION

Leverage social proof

By leveraging social dynamics, You can increase your chosen feeling or attitude/mood.

Simply put, whatever you have chosen to feel, you can increase that feeling thanks to the input of others, this means feeling more confidence or any other high-power feeling: Warmth, charisma, strength…

This is a virtuous and sequential circle that starts with:

– Step 1: Your self-PERCEPTION
You consciously signal a high-power attitude when alone and/or with others.
→ Your self-perception (you)

– Step 2: Your self-PROJECTION
You maintain it so that the people around you will perceive it.
→ Your self-projection (you & others)

– Step 3: Your social PERCEPTION
You keep and stay steady with your projected high-power attitude until others unconsciously perceive it.
→ Your social perception (you & others)

– Step 4: Your social REPUTATION
Over time your projected high-power attitude will become their norm with you, and they will reflect it to you, this is the power of social dynamics.
→ Your social reputation (others & you)

This sequence set the positive cycle of projection & reputation!

Simply put:
“How you treat yourself becomes how others treat you”

Calibration & consistency is key

The importance & impact of CALIBRATION

Calibration remains CRITICAL when dealing with social interactions, this means that you would want to signal cues that are relevant and appropriate to the situation.

A counter-example is shouting when talking to a friend in the quiet section of a library, it is not appropriate to that context.

Calibration can be improved over time with practice and experimentation.

The importance of CONSISTENCY

When doing so with people who ALREADY know you, it is most likely to take more time. As it might be necessary for them to adjust. This is because of the existing social dynamics amongst you. With new people, the adjustment period would be much shorter and even take a very short moment.

In both cases, it is up to you to calibrate your attitude and maintain it.

Social dynamics & time

What is social dynamic?

Social dynamics is the observation and assessment of the interaction between a person and other individuals or groups. When meeting new people, most of us set up social dynamics unconsciously: Who influences whom? Who leads and who follows whom? Who respects and who abuses whom?

Examples of social dynamics
– The manager & employee relationship
– The older sibling leading the younger siblings
– The bullies bullying the bullied

The importance & impact of TIME with CALIBRATION

As mentioned previously, social dynamics are very important when using the power of SELF-PROJECTION to SOCIAL PERCEPTION.

When leveraging your SELF-PROJECTION for SOCIAL REPUTATION, you might receive pushback from people with whom you have an existing social dynamic.

This is because they already know you!
They might not expect anything different from what they already know of you.

Therefore, the social perception and adjustment, from a low to a high-power attitude, might take more time.

An example: A bullied person staying or changing schools
If a bullied person stays in the same school and decides to adopt a high-power postures, more than likely that person will get a big pushback from the existing bullies.
While in a new school and with new people, the other students might received more openly the high power signalling as the social dynamic aren’t yet set.
→ This example is as relevant to all social circles as all social circles are conditionned by social dynamics.

Due to the complexity of social dynamics, calibrating your high-power signalling & staying consistent with it is even more crucial.

Enjoyed this article & curious to take it to the next level?

Realise that this article is an extract from the fundamentals of the Social Intelligence & Emotional Intelligence workshops.

These workshops are transformative blends of relaxation, mind management & communication tools & techniques. 

Designed to release your best, these workshops will deliver you the methods to :
Become more relaxed & reduce your stress
Be in charge of your emotions & increase your well-being
Develop your leadership & influence

→ For any questions about these workshops, you can schedule your FREE discovery call to find out more.

Up until next time, go learn & go RELEASE YOUR BEST !!!

The post 🚀 Boost your mood in a heartbeat: Power up your E-motion with motion! 💃🕺 first appeared on Release your BEST.

Is this FOR you?

By the end of this article, you will have:

Picked up the necessary knowledge to observe body language: Motion detection

Uncovered one of your most unconscious body language patterns: the “E-motion/Motion” looping effect.

Noticed how this unconscious pattern exposes your E-motions and even what is on your mind.

Realised how this E-motion/Motion” looping pattern dictates your motions: how you move, your posture, gestures & facial expressions.

Uncovered how this innate pattern forces you to behave one way or the other.

Appreciated how this unconscious pattern of “E-motion/Motion” can improve or worsen your well-being & state of mind.

Is this like YOU?

� Would it be useful for you to:
– Raise your self-awareness & social awareness on body language basics?
– Increase your understanding of the importance of body language & its impact on how you feel?
– Learn about your innate drive and instinct, coming from both your body and mind, to act in very specific ways?

What will you learn?

You will learn about the “E-motion/Motion” feedback loop, specifically:
– What it does to you
– How it impacts you mentally, physically & socially.

Reminder – Why learn this?

With this knowledge, you would be in an improved position to:
Gear yourself toward the impact & results that you want
Increase your self-awareness and social awareness
Manage any unwanted thoughts or behaviour stemming from your PRIMAL mind (Emotional brain)

E-motion brings motion !

Motion detection: What to observe in body language

Motions: Face, body, movements & voice

When interacting with others, do you know what to look out for when observing their body language?

You look at their non-verbal signals, this means paying attention to everything other than what they say.

Observing non-verbal signals are specifically 4 elements:
– VOICE: Sounds & silences
– FACE: Expression & micro-expressions
– BODY: Posture
– MOVEMENTS: Gestures & speed

Observing non-verbal signals is paying attention to everything except their words.

Noticing the changes in the voice, face, body & movements.

In this article, we will focus on the FACE, BODY & MOVEMENTS elements of non-verbal communication.

“E-motion gives Motion” effect

E-motions showed by your motions (how you move)

As you may have already noticed, when FEELING a mood/emotion or THINKING certain thoughts, your body expresses it.

Examples:

Happiness :

Face: Eyes bright & open smile …
Body: chest up
Movements: Arms open, taking space …

Hurt :

Face: Eyes closed, head to the side, closed mouth …
Body: Chest down
Movements: Hands crossed, close to the body, slow and not taking space …

Anger:

Face: Eyes clenched, eyebrows frowning, mouth, closed or open with narrowing of the lip corners …
Body: Chest out
Movements: Hands are clinched, moving fast and taking space …

Suspicion :

Face: Eyes clenched, head to the side, pursed mouth …
Body: Chest turned to the side
Movements: Hands are crossed, in front of or near the body, …

Shock/Surprise:

Face: Eyes wide open in disbelief, eyebrows and forehead raised, mouth open and jaw dropped …
Body: Chest up …
Movements: Hands to the face or side,

These examples demonstrate the obvious & natural pattern of:

→  What you think & feel is what you do with your face, body, and gestures (non-verbal signals), this process often occurs unconsciously.

Your E-motions are expressed unconsciously by your motions: face, body & gestures (Non-verbal).

“Motion brings E-Motion” effect

Mind and body harmony

After learning & understanding the “E-Motion TO Motion”, you can also realise how your body and mind have to be in harmony, this means “Motion WITH E-Motion”.

This means that your body & mind have to be congruent & in sync. You can verify this right now with the exercises below.

How good is your body & mind harmony

In these exercises, you can adopt the following poses & postures (non-verbals) and say the suggested sentences (verbal).

As each of these hold different vocal & physical meanings, you can see if you can feel that need for “staying in sync”.

You will most likely realise this innate need for congruency, which will make your mind & body bug. This would be like a computer bugging when running two conflicting programs at the same time: switching on & switching off.

Exercise # 1: Get annoyed & hold a victory pose

1 – Remember something that annoyed you
2 – Put a smile on your face & hold a victory pose (High-power pose)
3 – Now, keep smiling and keep remembering that annoying time
4 – Keep remembering your annoying story & maintain that smile all along

� Are you able to feel annoyed, or can you not?

→ Most likely you can’t and this is thanks to your body and mind congruence.

Exercise # 2: Put your head down & claim that you feel energised

1 – Take this depressed posture (Low-power pose)
2 – Kneel or crouch, put your head down, hands in between your head
3 – Mumble & say quietly: “I feel happy & full of energy”

� How do you feel?

→ Most likely you would feel the opposite of feeling happy & full of energy!

Exercise # 3: Flex your biceps hard & claim that you feel depressed

1 – Take this pose (High power pose)
2 – Pump your chest out & flex hard your biceps, do it hard and strong
3 – Say very LOUDLY “I feel depressed & and down”

� How do you feel?

→ Most likely, you would feel the opposite of feeling depressed & down!

Your inability to feel the opposite of what your body is doing is due to the necessary congruency of your “E-motion” with your “motion”.

Your “E-motion” has to be in harmony with your “motion”.

Your posture can make you feel worse

Science fact
In a study group by Riskind, J.H and Gotay, C.C (1982) “Physical posture: Could it have regulating or feedback effects on Motivation and emotion?” (Motivation & emotion 6 273-98), two groups of participants were asked to do the same task yet with different postures:

– The first group was asked to do it with a hunched & tensing posture.

– The second group was asked to do the SAME task, do it with a straight spine.

→ Result of the study :
The participants of the first group with the hunched posture reported:
– Higher levels of stress
– Lots of stomach knots

Note:
A hunched & tensed posture is a low-power behavioural expression, which is linked to fatigue, insecurity, and lethargy.
A straight spine with your chest up is a high-power stance, which is linked to energy, confidence, and strength.

Your posture can improve or worsen your moods or feelings :
→ Your “Motion” can impact your “E-motion”

The “E-motion/Motion” looping effect

Following how Motion impacts E-motion, you can start noticing the looping effect of how “E-motion/Motion:

Any unwanted moods & disempowering feelings can be reduced or replaced with a high-power posture, this is via the “E-motion/Motion” looping effect.

In the next article, you will learn how to master the “E-motion/Motion” looping effect, with it, you can:
Get rid of unwanted emotions & moods
Decide if you want to feel confident, happy, intimidating…
Choose how you can be perceived by others & leverage it to turn it into a recurrent social dynamic.

With the “E-motion/Motion” looping effect, unwanted moods can be diminished with a high-power posture

Enjoyed this article & curious to take it to the next level?

Realise that this article is an extract from the fundamentals of the Social Intelligence & Emotional Intelligence workshops.

These workshops are transformative blends of relaxation, mind management & communication tools & techniques. 

Designed to release your best, these workshops will deliver you the methods to :
Become more relaxed & reduce your stress
Be in charge of your emotions & increase your well-being
Develop your leadership & influence

→ For any questions about these workshops, you can schedule your FREE discovery call to find out more.

Up until next time, go learn & go RELEASE YOUR BEST !!!

The post 💡 Unlock Success: Master the Art of “E-Motion & Motion” – Your guide to body language brilliance! 🚀 first appeared on Release your BEST.

Is this FOR you?

By the end of this article, you will have :

Raised your awareness of your thoughts

Boosted your peace & happiness hormones with a simple, natural, and easy method.

Provided you with an alternative for dealing with stress, anxiety, depression, and more.

Is this like YOU?

� When you are stressed or overwhelmed, have you ever wanted to check out & disconnect from these stressful thoughts?

� Would a short, relaxing & mind refreshing practice be beneficial for you?

→ This practice will allow you to check out & come back at peace, at ease, with a clear mind and NO stressful thoughts.

What will you learn?

You will learn about :
– The optimal mindset for mindfulness
– Practice mindfulness of breathing

Reminder – Why learn this?

With this knowledge, you would be in an improved position to:
Increase your well-being & happiness
Manage any unwanted thoughts or behaviour steeming from your PRIMAL (Emotional) mind

E-motion brings motion !

Reminder – The 3 core principles of mindfulness

As highlighted in this article, the 3 core principles of mindfulness practice are :

Principle 1: Notice what you notice and as far as possible, without judgment or expectation, 

Principle 2:Bring your awareness to whatever sensations that you may find, moment by moment

Principle 3: Use your body and breath, as your home base for your attention

Mind-set for your mind-fulness

Mindset for your first session

If possible, be and stay curious about this new experience.

As this is something new for you, becoming comfortable can take time, and building comfort is a process.

If possible, it is best to leave any judgment after a couple of sessions, this is to get the most out of this highly beneficial practice.

Until then, wait to form your perception of the practice and do the practice with an open mind.

Get the most by staying curious, trusting the process & carrying on practising.

Mindset after a couple of sessions

Whatever the outcome will be, decide what are the benefits and pick what you can take away with you.

Practice, take what you like & leave the rest.

Mindfulness of breathing – FREE Audio

Unlike mindfulness with the body scan, this is a short-form practice.

The practitioner brings awareness to ONLY the breath.

As it is about 12 minutes, it can be practised during the day and at any time you can.

When possible, listen to this FREE tape. It will guide you step by step on how to raise your awareness of your breath and fully relax you.

Enjoyed this article?

This article is an extract of calm & stress management & Emotional intelligence workshops.

These workshops are a transformative blend of relaxation, mind management & communication tools & techniques. 

Designed to release your best, these workshops deliver you the methods to :
Become more relaxed & reduce your stress
Be in charge of your emotions & increase your well being
Develop your leadership & influence

→ For any questions about these courses, you can schedule your FREE discovery call to find out more.

Up until next time, go practice, go learn & go RELEASE YOUR BEST !!!

The post 🍃😌Embrace Serenity: FREE mindfulness of breathing audio for your relaxation and contentment 🌿🎧 first appeared on Release your BEST.

Is this FOR you?

What you will learn today will get you to :

Realise the benefits of mindfulness for most aspects of your life.

Grasp what mindfulness is

Discover how mindfulness can benefit you

Separate the myths from science about mindfulness

Is this like YOU?

� Have you ever had thoughts that got you to :
– Check out mentally when you are learning or speaking to someone?
– Go blank, during a presentation or an interview?
– Freak yourself out by thinking about what could happen next?

� When you are stressed or overwhelmed, have you ever wanted to disconnect?

� Have you ever heard of mindfulness & yet haven’t really grasped what it is?

What will you learn?

You will learn about mindfulness, specifically:
– What it is
– Why you need it
– Its scientific studies
– Its core principles

With this knowledge, you would be in an improved position to manage any unwanted thoughts or behavior coming from your PRIMAL (Emotional) mind.

Reminder – Why learn this?

With this knowledge, you would be in an improved position to:
Gear yourself toward the impact & results you want
Increase your well-being & happiness
Manage any unwanted thoughts or behaviour steeming from your PRIMAL (Emotional) mind

E-motion brings motion !

Reminder – Your instinct to CONSTANTLY interpret information

As exposed previously in this article, your instinct is to CONSTANTLY interpret information.

Your brain is set to constantly give meaning to a present experience in reference to your past, future, or incoming consequences.

We are too often busy judging, interpreting & reacting instead of just being present.

Why do you need to be mindful?

These CONSTANT thoughts can disturb your focus, it doesn’t allow you to be fully present & immersed in that moment.

Would it be helpful to you to:

STOP this internal chatter?
Move your attention is on what’s happening?
Be immersed by listening & observing?
Respond instead of reacting?

→ The capacity to be in the present moment can be developed with mindfulness practice.

Mindfulness

The benefits of mindfulness

Once practiced and mastered, mindfulness will deliver numerous short & long-term benefits.

Short-term benefits of mindfulness: 

Relax you and appease your PRIMAL (Emotional) mind patterns

Raise your conscious awareness of your thoughts & feelings

Become familiar with your own mind

Learning to be awake and present in important moments of your life

Long-term benefits of mindfulness: 

Develop your body awareness:
This is crucial in establishing the foundation of the awareness of your thoughts.
This is because your body can be your notification system
Your body acts and reacts before you consciously do as highlighted in this article.

Your body act & react before you do

Learn to relate in an alternative way to challenges.

Enter easily a flow state or be “In the zone” :
It is your mental state when you are immersed & focused on an activity.
In that state, you are fully involved and perform excellently and naturally in this activity.

What is mindfulness?

Mindfulness is your ability to CONSCIOUSLY pay attention without any judgment to :

– Your inner world :
Current body sensations, feelings, thoughts, and emotions.

– The outer world :
Nature, people, place, and anything else that is around at that present moment

Mindfulness is your ability to experience the present moment & without any judgement

What did the science say about mindfulness?

Leading academic research institutions have demonstrated the effectiveness of mindfulness.

Science fact

Their studies have shown that with constant practice, structural and functional changes occur in the brain, some of these are :

– Grey matter increase in the brain regions in charge of muscle control, sensory perception, memory, emotions, speech, decision making, and self-control – Research by Hoezel and Lazar of Harvard University, and others, published in 2011

– Decreased brain activation in the amygdala (PRIMAL emotional mind) – Research by Goldin and Gross of Stanford University, published in 2010

– Increased brain activity in the prefrontal cortex (RATIONAL brain), in charge of regulation of your emotions & stress levels – Research by Davidson of The University of Wisconsin – Madison published in 2012 & 2013.

2 formal practices: Body scan & breathing

There are essentially 2 formal practices of mindfulness, the length and focus vary upon the practice, there is:

– Mindfulness with the body scan

In this long-form practice, the practitioner brings awareness by feeling any sensation to EVERY part of the body one after the other. 

As it is less than 30 minutes, this is best suited for early morning or late evening practice.

– Mindfulness of breathing

In this short-form practice, the practitioner brings awareness to ONLY the breath, this is about 10 minutes so it can be practiced during the day and pretty much any time you can.

Note: You can practice by listening to the audio tape in this article

The 3 core principles

Whatever the form, the 3 core principles of mindfulness practice are :

Principle 1: Notice what you notice and as far as possible, without judgment or expectation, 

Principle 2 : Bring your awareness to whatever sensations that you may find, moment by moment

Principle 3: Use your body and breath, as your home base for your attention

Enjoyed this article?

This article is an extract of the Calm & stress management & Emotional intelligence workshops.

These workshops are a transformative blend of relaxation, mind management & communication tools & techniques. 

Designed to release your best, these workshops deliver you the methods to :
Become more relaxed & reduce your stress
Be in charge of your emotions & increase your well being
Develop your leadership & influence

→ For any questions about these courses, you can schedule your FREE discovery call to find out more.

Up until the next time go learn & go RELEASE YOUR BEST !!!

The post ⚡️🧠 Supercharge your mind with Mindfulness: Crush stress, boost focus, and find your happy place!😊🏡 first appeared on Release your BEST.

Is this FOR you?

By the end of this article, you will have :

Raised your self-awareness of your emotional patterns

Discovered your existing emotional/PRIMAL patterns

Realised HOW your PRIMAL mind influences some of your behaviours, reactions & attitudes

Is this like YOU?

Did it ever happen to you:

� Take things “too” personally?

� Not stop yourself from indulging?

� Feel uncomfortable about situations & later realise that “It wasn’t that bad”?

What will you learn?

You will learn about the 3 temperament features of your PRIMAL mind.

Reminder – Why learn this?

With this knowledge, you would be in an improved position to:
Gear yourself toward the impact & results you want
Increase your well-being & confidence
Manage any unwanted thoughts or behaviour stemming from your PRIMAL (Emotional) mind

E-motion brings motion !

Reminder – Your PRIMAL mind is part of your brain architecture, follows a thought process & holds functions

This article is a part of the series about your PRIMAL (Emotional) mind.

The 1rst article demonstrated how your PRIMAL (Emotional) is a MAJOR part of your brain architecture, you can read it to understand what you are made of.

The 2nd article introduced what are your PRIMAL (Emotional) functions & thought processes.

PRIMAL temperament feature # 1: Insecurity

PRIMAL – ALL or NOTHING Thinking

Situations are seen in :
→ Black & white
→ No silver linings

Examples: ALL or NOTHING Thinking:
– “End of the world !”
– “The best thing ever !!”

Situations can often be perceived as :
– Catastrophic
– Short-sighted
– Framed as “Winners OR losers”

PRIMAL paranoia (Not factual)

Seeks out threats & danger from situations/places with NO factual danger

Example: At work, the manager is doing an unannounced visit:
➔ Staff may worry about their job security (Threat detected by the personal alarm!)
➔ Is there FACTUAL reasons that threaten your job security? Underperformance, absences, …

PRIMAL temperament feature # 2: EGO invested

Self-centred – “About ME ?!”

  The PRIMAL (emotional) mind brings ANY information for self-assessment:
➔ “It is about ME ?!”

Example # 1: Self-centred –“About ME ?!“
Notice when you might say :
–“I like tea with milk”
➔ In response, people may answer/think :
–“Yeah, me too” OR
– “No, I don’t like tea” …

Example # 2: Self-centred – “About ME ?!”
– Have you ever heard people laughing when you are walking by?
– And then thought?
➔ “Are they laughing at me?”

This means that whenever someone is doing something :
➔ It is always about YOU & always about THEM

Self-serving – “ME first !”

Your PRIMAL mind has an innate instinct to :
✓ Focus ONLY you!
✓ Have LOW/NO consideration for other’s needs

Self-righteous – “Not ME !”

 The blame-shifting nature of the PRIMAL (emotional) goes along the lines of :
➔ “I am right, you’re wrong !”
➔ “It’s YOUR fault, not mine !!”
➔ “I am innocent, it is because of the others”

Examples: Self-righteous- “Not ME !”
– In a heated argument, parties would try to prove that the others are wrong & it is ALL the others’ fault.
– Each party would claim to be “innocent” or “have nothing to do with it”

PRIMAL temperament feature # 3: Hedonistic

Act on IMPULSES

  Actions & decisions are with :
– Focus on NOW ➔ Short-term GAIN/PLEASURE
– Quick to judge/decide
– NO consideration for LATER/long term
– NO consideration for consequences

Examples: Act on IMPULSES
– Being so angry to argue with someone & eventually physically fight
– Wishing that person dead !!
– Overeating junk food: cookies, sweets …
– Binge drinking
– Unprotected intercourse (no precautions)

➔ No consideration of consequences:
– How you would feel after/the next day?
– What will be the impact on your physical & mental health?

Avoid PAIN & feel-good NOW

✓ Take the easiest path
✓ Take the path of the least resistance
✓ Make plans on what feels good immediately

Examples: Avoid PAIN & feel-good NOW
 – Ordering takeaway in bed instead of standing up, cooking & washing the dishes afterwards
– Skipping the gym session to rest when rest is not needed!

How useful is your PRIMAL mind?

Your PRIMAL (Emotional) mind is in charge of your emotions, as explained in this article.

Now consider these practical cases involving your PRIMAL mind :

– Love is beautiful ➔ It can also become excessive & possessive jealousy
– Anger can protect you ➔ You can also badly hurt someone & get you in jail
– Planning is helpful ➔ While extreme worrying is not

➔ The PRIMAL mind has good intentions for oneself

➔ Your PRIMAL mind might require CALIBRATION IN EXECUTION

RATIONAL mind plays a crucial role in regulating your PRIMAL intentions

How good are you at managing your PRIMAL patterns

You can become an expert in self-management with your CITIZEN mind (Rational brain) by :

Discovering its features

Mastering its process & methods of execution

This is explained in this article.

Enjoyed this article?

This article is an extract from the calm & stress management & Emotional intelligence workshops.

These workshops are a transformative blend of relaxation, mind management & communication tools & techniques. 

Designed to release your best, these workshops deliver you the methods to :
Become more relaxed & reduce your stress
Be in charge of your emotions & increase your well-being
Develop your leadership & influence

→ For any questions about these courses, you can schedule your FREE discovery call to find out more.

Up until the next time, go learn & go RELEASE YOUR BEST !!!

The post 🤯 Disclosing your PRIMAL mind nature : How to escape the pitfalls of ego, insecurity & fleeting love! 💔 first appeared on Release your BEST.

Is this FOR you?

By the end of this article, you will have :

Raised your awareness of one of your instincts

Realised how this instinct prevents your optimal performance in ALL aspects of your life

Set foundational knowledge for improving your cognitive skills

Is this like YOU?

When speaking and dealing with others, did it ever happen to you to :
� Check out when others are speaking to you?
� Lose track of what they are saying?
� Wander off mentally when you are learning?

Also, did it ever happen to you to :
� Go blank, during a presentation or when speaking to someone?
� Freak yourself out by thinking about what could happen next?

What will you learn?

You will :
– Learn about your natural instinct to constantly interpret
– Find out how it prevents you from doing things naturally
– Understand how mindfulness can help with that

Reminder – Why learn this?

With this knowledge, you would be in an improved position to:
Increase your self-awareness
Manage any unwanted thoughts or behaviour steeming from your PRIMAL (Emotional) mind

E-motion brings motion !

Reminder – Your brain innate sequence

As presented in the mind map article, your brain follows an innate sequence of :

• Perception
• Interpretation
• Reaction

Your instinct to CONSTANTLY interpret information

Notice how our minds are naturally, automatically & CONSTANTLY interpreting information.
Our brains are wired to give meaning to the present experience 

As highlighted in this article, often the interpretation is either in reference to your:

• Past 
• Future consequences
• Incoming consequences (Not present)

Event example #1: You see someone running/exercising

Interpretation/meaning examples : 

→ Past
– It can remind you of how you used to run or that you never liked running.

→ Incoming consequences
– It may remind you that you can’t be bothered to exercise today.

→ Future consequences
– Or that you might try to get back on exercising this weekend

Your brain is set for constantly give meaning to a present experience

This in reference to your past, future or incoming consequences

Event example #2: You are being asked to do a presentation

Interpretation/meaning examples : 

→ Past
– It reminds you of the last time you did a presentation

→ Past
– It may trigger events linked to memories that might be recalled as unhelpful “Last time it was a disaster”

→ Immediate consequences
– You may think how it feels uncomfortable to have that many eyes on you

→ Future consequences
– While presenting, you may feel that the audience is not really listening and that you have to do well otherwise people will laugh at you.

What does science say about thoughts?

Science fact

According to this article, a study suggested that the people observed have more than 6,000 thoughts per day.

A psychotherapist in this article indicated that a good amount of these thoughts are either about the past or the future, specifically about:

– What went wrong?
– What will go wrong?

→ What does this say about your thoughts? 

Realise that these behaviours are essentially caused by your internal chatter, your thoughts.

→ How come these thoughts prevent you from performing well?

Your THOUGHTS can HURT your performance

Why this instinct worsens your performance

Realise that in these examples and eventually in your own life experience, you can notice that often we are busy interpreting, judging, and thinking.

All of this instead of just being present.

We are busy judging, interpreting & reacting instead of just being present

Would it be helpful to :
STOP this internal chatter?
Move your attention to what’s happening?
Be immersed by listening & observing?
Respond instead of reacting?

This internal chatter PREVENTS you from entering a flow state or “being in the zone”.

To be or not to be “in the zone“

Be “in the zone” or a flow state, is your mental state when you are fully immersed & focused on an activity.

In that state, you are fully involved, you can perform well and naturally in this activity.

Note :
Internal chatter prevents you from “being in the zone”.

These thoughts are constantly disturbing your focus, it doesn’t allow you to be fully present & immersed in the moment.

Internal chatter STOPS you from “being in the zone” & immersed in the present moment

→ How effective will you be once you mastered how to be mindful of the “present moment”?

Maximise your performance with mindfulness

The capacity to be in the present moment can be developed by mindfulness practice.

Its benefits are numerous as exposed by several scientifical research all highlighted in this article.

Enjoyed this article?

This article is an extract of calm & stress management & Emotional intelligence workshops.

These workshops are a transformative blend of relaxation, mind management & communication tools & techniques. 

Designed to release your best, these workshops deliver you the methods to :
Become more relaxed & reduce your stress
Be in charge of your emotions & increase your well being
Develop your leadership & influence

→ For any questions about these workshops, you can schedule your FREE discovery call to find out more.

Up until next time, go learn & go RELEASE YOUR BEST !!!

The post 🎭🚀Unmasking the silent killer of success: How interpretation is secretly sabotaging your performance! 🚨 first appeared on Release your BEST.